From Frolic Pictures:

 

What happens in this hospital would make you sick! From the weirdest depths of the twisted mind of Andy Milligan, Hollywood’s weirdest director, comes Surgikill! A film you may have once heard your drunk uncle blabbering about, the camp staple and undeniably last in the filmography of the “Ed Wood of Staten Island,” Andy Milligan. He was one of the last great exploiters, that has left us. He died of AIDS in 1992, three years after he made this wonderful madcap horror-comedy. It was originally penned by screenwriter Sherman Hirsh, but was quickly de-materialized, poking fun at itself onscreen. What could have been a serious slasher, Andy re-wrote into a silly slapstick of blood and guts (with a very alluring transvestite). Until now, Surgikill has never gotten a proper release. Frolic Pictures saw the picture, and bought all the rights, for an undisclosed amount, knowing that everyone must see this film! No horror movie collection would be complete without our forefather’s last cinematic breath of life. Digitally restored and re-mastered from the original 35mm print. A painstakingly tedious process coordinated by Media Arts Productions. Hollywood independent filmmaker Jared Masters pioneered the expedition, commissioning new art and overseeing restoration of Milligan’s original cut.

It was such a nice little hospital until those people started dying! Who is trying to murder everyone at Goode Community Hospital? Will the dedicated head of the hospital, Dr. Grace Goode, keep her head while everyone else is losing theirs? There are guts all over the place. Do you have the guts to watch? It’s every patient’s worst nightmare. Why? Because it could happen!

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Starring Cult Film Goddess Bouvier (Club Lingerie) as Dr. Grace Goode, with Bob Peck (Jurassic Park) Dan Foster-Jones, Douglas M. Eames, Patrick Thomas, Jim Allen, Shari Logan, Michael Lungsford, Kip Reynolds, Jimmy Williams, Linda Collins, Al Silver and Robert Odell. Written, directed and photographed by Andy Milligan. Based on an original story by Sherman Hirsh. Executive producer John Van Harlingen.

 

 

Click Here to buy Surgikill from Amazon.com!

For more info, check out http://frolicpictures.com/surgikill







Frasier is my favorite sitcom of all time. I believe I’ve seen every episode at least a dozen times. One or twice a year, I’ll restart the series from the beginning and watch it all over again. What does my unhealthy obsession with one of the best sitcoms ever produced have to do with this site? Well, a few weeks back, while in the middle of yet another rewatch session, the following exchange between Frasier and his father caught my attention:

 

Upon returning home from viewing the latest, and sadly fictional, Jean-Claude Van Damme film:

Martin: “Didn’t you learn anything from that movie?”

Frasier: “Yes. Only that bullets are useless against a man who can kick really high.”

 

That great observation of the typical Van Damme film got me thinking about how many silly little lessons could be gleaned from bad movies—the philosophy of b-movies, if you will. So, forget all about traditional concepts of epistemology, aesthetics, and ethics–we’ve got Philoso-B! That is and ought to be all you need!

In this inaugural installment of BadMovieRealm.com’s Philoso-B!, we take our lesson from the 1987 film, The Garbage Pail Kids Movie.

While there are many lessons we can take from this particular film (not the least of which being that the ‘80s were mostly a dark and evil time), the most important lesson comes from the gastronomically-gifted character of Windy Winston. In the following clip, we see how he deals with an insult about he and his friends’ lack of aesthetic appeal (in layman’s terms, they are circus fugly!).

The lesson learned? Any personal attack, no matter how small, must be avenged….one hundred fold. Preferably with flatulence. Horrible, otherworldly, room-clearing flatulence.

 

If you have an example of a lesson you’ve learned from bad movies, feel free to post it in the comments, e-mail it to us at webmaster@badmovierealm.com, or send it to us on Twitter, @BadMovieRealm. If we like it, we’ll use it in an upcoming installment of Philoso-B! and give you credit! So start submitting!

 

BONUS! I leave you with this picture of the aforementioned Jean-Claude Van Damme, courtesy of The Guardian. No caption is necessary.

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From Frolic Pictures:

Just in time for Christmas! The bold, daring and shocking murder-mystery comedy Club Lingerie starring cult film Goddess Bouvier (Surgikill) is now available to ship right to your very door! The perfect stocking stuffer (if your stockings dangle wide and strong)! This is not a motion picture for the shallow cinematic heart. You will laugh, you will gasp with fright, and you will be awestruck by a cast that dare to defy the laws of modern cinema, in all it’s wildly curious spender! See why this movie had to be made! The story of cougar who courageously pioneers the financial turnaround of her grandfather’s beloved nightclub! See gorgeous models die in the negligees before your very eyes, in the most unusual ways! See shoe-bombs going off, and blow-darts lodged into your very favorite girl!

Film critic Mike Haberfelner says “Club Lingerie is not just a murder mystery, first and foremost it’s a great deal of fun featuring quite a few very lovely girls wearing very little … a fun comedy interludes by quite a few fan faves like Dawna Lee Heising and Richie Lillard as a perverted couple, Domiziano Arcangeli as the jealous boyfriend of one of the models, Maria Olsen as a cookie flower girl, and a homicidal dominatrix – who doesn’t have anything to do with the rest of the film but is fun all the same. Now add to this details like a dog in lingerie, one perverted character who’s actually nothing more than a muppet, inexplicably, and a little dance number to close the movie, and you’re in a very weird place already, only accentuated by the directorial effort that is more reminiscent of 1970s grindhouse cinema than everything else (which goes very well with the story as such of course) … and you’ve got yourself a highly entertaining little romp!”

The film stars Bouvier, Jacqueline Guzman, Andy Dick, Dawna Lee Heising, Richie Lillard, Jessica Knopf, Domiziano Arcangeli, Geo Sargent, Art Roberts, Jennifo Box, Sydney Raye Smith, Mindy Robinson, Nicole Shipley, and Maria Olsen, with Alexandra Skiba, Vera Taylor, Laura Amelia, Jesse Briandi, Lauren Taler, Robert Evans, Glenn Brunno, Anjela Gotsulyak, Joe Karam, Kara Michelotti, Liliana Lev, Rachel LeMar, Ernesto Orellano, Trevor Doss, Varian Gray, Ashley Kyron, Curtis Simmons, David Bocanegra, Mickey Woodall, Shelley Sheraton, Mystic Marlow and LeJon. The film is produced by John Van Harlingen, Bouvier, Julia Faye West, Sunny Vachher, Jacqueline Guzman Cereceres, Michael Anthony, Mikko Tervonen and Seth Metoyer. Art Direction by Ryan Henneman. Stills by David Levin, Valerie Val and Melanie J. Brown.­­ Make-up by Bahieh Claggett. Production design by Mystic Marlow. Directed by Jared Masters. See Club Lingerie. The last intimacy she’ll ever wear!