1965 B&W 77min
Starring: Marilyn Hanold, Lou Cutell, James Karen, Nancy Marshall, David Kerman, Robert Reilly and Bruce Glover.
Directed By: Robert Gaffney
I sometimes wonder how Mary Shelley would feel about her most famous creation if she were alive today. Would she be furious at the sometimes-obscene liberties taken with her beloved character? Would cheap, loosely-based rip-offs like “Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster” cause her to send scathing, indignant letters to the editor of The London Times? Or would she take it more good-naturedly and simply be flattered that her work was still being enjoyed so many years after its initial publication? “Oh dear, I’m just glad to see the young people are still reading today.” she might be heard to say, not realizing for a moment that movies aren’t read. (A woman from her era can’t honestly be expected to fully grasp the nuances of these newfangled moving pictures, can she?)
Yes, I often wonder about these things, that is until I realize that were Mary Shelley alive today she would be well over 200 years of age and would probably have much more important things to worry herself about. Baking cookies for eight generations of grandchildren would take a considerable amount of time and effort. Keeping on top of prescription medication would be a costly and time-consuming affair, as well. Why the monthly budget for creams and ointments alone for a 200 year old woman would likely be in the thousands. Sure, she has those Frankenstein royalties to fall back on, but that is no guarantee of financial security is it? But I digress.
Our movie today, Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster, tells the story of stock footage and its never-ending quest for dominance in the world of B-movies…No wait, that’s all wrong. Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster tells the story of Frank Saunders, a “United States Astro-Robot” (I had no idea we even had those) who gets his electro-brain scrambled by a group of invading aliens. Being blasted by a ray gun is obviously outside of his recommended operations manual (and probably voided his warranty), as Frank goes a little haywire after his encounter with the aliens.
This is why you shouldn’t shave with a belt sander.Poor Frank (Frank-enstein. Get it?) spends almost the entirety of the movie aimlessly wandering about, killing anyone he sees. In the meantime the invading aliens, led by Princess Marcuzan (Played by Marilyn Hanold) and her loyal advisor, the aptly named Dr. Nadir (Played very enthusiastically by Lou Cutell) are abducting beautiful young women for their plan to repopulate their war-ravaged home planet. Everything goes well, until they are discovered by Frank’s creator, Dr. Adam Steele (Played by James Karen of Return of the Living Dead fame). Dr. Steele finds and repairs Frank and orders him to keep watch over the aliens until the military can arrive and destroy them. Unfortunately for Frank, he is discovered taken captive by the aliens. Once inside their ship (Which looks like Epcot Center), Frank awakens, frees the captured women and destroys the invading alien menace, but not before having to face Mull, the titular and rather hairy, space monster.
Mull, the terrifying space monster.
(You should probably ignore the fluorescent lights on the ceiling)Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster is a discombobulated mess of a film. It is primarily composed of stock footage (more than you could shake an entire forest of sticks at, to be honest) with random scenes of dialogue and music montages thrown in for good measure. The soundtrack was composed mainly of two songs, and you get to hear each of them twice…in their entirety. The film’s saving grace is, without a doubt, Lou Cutell’s performance as Nadir. It is worth the price of admission all by itself. To say that he plays him over the top would be a gross understatement. To be blunt, Mr. Cutell chews so much scenery in this thing that it is a wonder that he managed to avoid chipping a tooth in the process.
I hope you folks aren’t allergic to ham.So is this, as some have claimed, the worst movie ever made? No, far from it actually. That distinction, in this reviewer’s opinion, must go to Monster a Go-Go or perhaps one of the Coleman Francis trilogy of films. While Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster is unquestionably a mess, it certainly manages to entertain throughout. Originally intended to be a comedy before producer-prompted rewrites, Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster manages to be hilarious anyway. Unintentionally hilarious perhaps, but in the end who really cares? Admittedly there may be tad more stock footage than I would generally care for, but without it the film would only clock in at about 17 minutes, so maybe it’s for the best. Plus this film contains not one, but two scooter-riding music montages, and that has to count for something, right?
Multi-million dollar experiment wreaking untold havoc. Evil aliens invading. Entire planet in jeopardy. I know, let’s go for a scooter ride!I leave you with my favorite scene from the movie. The aliens give a doofus dancing in his Speedo exactly what’s coming to him (and all Speedo-wearing doofi, if I had my way). I don’t think these aliens are all that bad after all.
Reviewed by Derek Miller
Posted 2/04/08
